What's Love Got To Do With It: Edward and Bella
- August 1st, 2008
- 6 Comments
I’ve been thinking about this a lot. So far I have been a big fan of the “Twilight Series” by Stephenie Meyer and I really enjoyed reading the first two books. I loved Twilight, thought New Moon was a little ridiculous but went with it anyways and figured the next one would be be better. I just started Eclipse and am about half way through it. I don’t think I’m going to finish it. I don’t think I can do it anymore. It finally crossed some kind of line that I didn’t even realize I had drawn. Up until now I’ve found the books so fun, I’ve been willing to overlook some of the more glaring, ‘things-that-make-you-go-hmmmm’, aspects.
I know there’s been a lot of controversy and criticism about the sexless eroticism in the series. The whole concept of Bella’s virginity essentially equally her soul worries more than a few of my feminist friends, but I’m not even going to touch that. I do however want to address the fact that our friend Bella is a poster-child for domestic, or in her case, dating abuse.
I know. It seems absurd. We are talking about vampires, predators by nature, right? But they can feel emotional and physical pain according to Meyer’s series. They have long-term relationships. They marry. It makes sense that they are also capable of our darker motivations in matters of the heart. No doubt, they can be controlling and that is of course at the center of all abuse—the engine that drives the power-and-control cycle of violence. That and fear.
And Edward is controlling. As much as I love him, I really think he needs some teen-dating, healthy-vampire-boyfriend-counseling. It all hit me last night as I was reading yet again about his protective ways. I began to see the forest through the trees. Things like: how he doesn’t “allow” her to do certain things like visit old friends. How Bella won’t be able to see her family for years after she’s changed, and even after that there will be constraints. We are made to believe that these precautions are all part of his concern for her safety. His condescension, lies and even manipulation of events like their trip to see Bella’s mother is all under the guise of safety and…alas love.
Let’s not forget that he watches her every night while she sleeps and can read her mind!
I worked in a battered women shelter for many years and I’ve heard this story almost verbatim on hotline calls hundreds of times. (Yes, I’ve even heard, “I think he/she reads my mind.”) It’s a slippery slope. Everyone wants to feel special. Everyone wants to feel like their love is unique, one-of a kind. Teenage girls are especially susceptible to this kind of ‘Romeo and Juliet’ romantic notion. The drama, the angst, the thrill of feeling misunderstood…together is timeless, but it gets dangerous when it starts to become suffocating. Abusers regularly alienate their partners from friends and family slowly but surely as they exert more and more control. The balance of power shifts subtly, but before long, victims have lost everything—their identity, independence and their self esteem. This is my fear for Bella.
Tell me, does Edward change his ways? Should I keep reading? I do believe in rehabilitation.
One thing we used to say to people in our trainings is that domestic violence crosses all class, religious and ethnic boundaries…I think we need to include the supernatural.
By and large, I’m not a HUGE fan of the Twilight series. It was a great recreational read, little more. But I’d honestly encourage you to finish reading the series.
I’d also encourage you to get better reading comprehension skills. One of the biggest themes in the first book is Edward’s inability to read Bella’s mind, and yet you clearly state in here that he can. It helps, more often than not, to really READ what you’re reading.
Hi No Kon—I edited Alli’s post and totally missed that, too, i.e. forgot that he couldn’t read her mind. Thanks for pointing that out.
Yeah, Thanks Kon. You’re right. That was really helpful and I’m working on my reading comprehension skills as we speak.
We all make mistakes no need to be so nasty.
Like No Kon said, he can’t read her mind.
I think you are reading way to far into this. It’s a story for fun. I hear people putting it down all the time and I just laugh because lots of times the people who are putting it down are the people who shouldn’t be reading them.
If you continue reading the books you’ll see that Edward changes, he lets her see Jacob. Yeah he may be controlling, but it IS because he’s worried for her saftey and he LOVES her.
That is the MAIN theme of the books, the uncontrollable love Bella and Edward have for each other.
It even says in the books that Edward is a little controlling, but he lessens because he truly cares for her and wants her to be happy.
Next time read the whole book before you judge too quickly.
Also, it’s not his decision that she shouldn’t see her family after she becomes a vampire. She can’t see them because once she’s a vampire she’ll want to kill them. You know the whole vampires wanting to suck blood thing?
If you read the 4th book you’ll see that a lot changes.
Continue reading. But keep in mind it’s a book targetting to girls in their teens.
First of all Edward can’t read Bella’s mind. Second of all you need to keep reading. There are different ways to look at all of the things that you are pointing at as abuse. With the werewolve thing, Edward believes that the werewolves are not safe for bella to be around especially since she defends the Cullens. He thinks that if she says one wrong thing or makes one wrong move that she might be killed. He is just really caring and protective. I highly suggest you read the whole book and then think back to what you wrote about in this article.
Ultimately, it’s Bella who makes Edward compromise his principles. She’s more controlling than he is.